Sunset over Cabo Frio (the Cold Cape), Brazil

Sunset over Cabo Frio (the Cold Cape), Brazil
where the warm north Altantic meets the cold south Atlantic. picture (c) phil marks 2009

Friday, 13 November 2009

Baggage and patience

Give some thought to the fact that as you go through life you collect experiences and your ‘personal CV’ gets longer. Similarly on the other side, and so learning about another person takes longer and there is more information to assimilate. That is why many people in the mature age-range can find the process of meeting new people exhausting and slow.

You’ll get used to meeting people who have recently divorced, and maybe haven’t yet come to terms with their new reality. I’ve been on a few dates where the lady has started talking about her marital breakup and started crying at the dinner table. Some people (both genders) take a very long time to get over things such as betrayal and marital breakdown. You may meet ladies who have been widowed and to whom no-one can surpass their husband. Think about these situations and how you might deal with them. You will need to consider whether the person you are meeting is really ready for a new relationship. And how about you? Are you ready, can you talk comfortably about your relationship(s) with a relative stranger?

It’s not unusual after starting to get to know someone over a couple of dates and being disappointed, that you may feel that you need a break from the process. That’s fine, just refresh and reflect. Also, think about how you have described your own history and experiences during the dating process.

I sometimes wonder what I used to talk about when I was dating as a student!

Lovesail Havenplace blue-hound

No comments:

Post a Comment